Study on Human Sexuality Interactions in a Local Bar

Background

The observation in this study was conducted on a local bar that is most frequented by University students. It is a favorite joint among students who wish to unwind themselves after a tiresome week of rigorous studying. The University has a cosmopolitan population, and thus the bar attracts people from different walks of life and culture. This is so essential in that the Local bar had to come up with different themed nights to cater for the vast clientele. However, for this study, the observation was conducted on a Friday night, which is classified as an urban-themed night by the bar. The observation started at 9 pm in the night and lasted for three hours. According to the bar manager, this is usually the time the club has a large number of people settled and others coming in. Besides this is the time where most of the people are active. In a bar setting with time, after people become drunk become inactive. Some may even sleep.

Most of the individuals started arriving from 8 pm in the night. They came in groups. There was a countable number of people who came alone. Most of the groups were composed of either guys or ladies only. However, there were instances where the groups were made of individuals from both sexes. In such cases the groups were small, and the members were in pairs (a guy and a lady).It could be assumed the pairs were couples. It is also worth noting that the groups spent a considerable amount of time outside waiting for their friends. At this stage, there were minimum interactions between different groups. The interactions were restricted to the members of each group. There was no socializing which you would expect in any bar setting. When the groups entered the bar, they all dispersed to different corners. The pairs moved to the furthest corners of the bar, which were dim lit. The other groups moved to the central locations of the bar. However, it is worth noting that while the groups of ladies preferred to move to the lounges, a majority of the groups of the guys remained on the counter of the bar. Being an urban-themed night, the ladies were dressed in extremely short and revealing clothes. None of them had a dress or skirt that went past their kneecap. Also, they wore bright ligaments perhaps to reflect the disco lights of the bar. On the other hand, the guys were dressed in casual outfits, predominantly denim jeans, and t-shirts.

As expected of any bar near a university setting, the majority of the population in the bar was young. They were in the age bracket of 18-24 years. Again, the groups were mixed up, made of individuals from different races. On average, each group had a Caucasian, Hispanic or a Black. This is what you would expect of any cosmopolitan population. Again, in each group, a senior member seemed to be in charge of the other members of the groups. The senior member was the one directing the other members where to go and where to sit. With loud music playing in the background, the emotional climate was relaxed. Laughter and lots of noise characterized it. This is expected, as the communication was unorganized. Again, the disk jockey seemed to be familiar to the members of each group. Each group member greeted the disk Jockey as he/she entered the bar.

Behavioral Results

The Couples.As earlier mentioned the couples moved to the furthest and darkest parts of the bar. It is the guy who led the lady. There were instances of gentleman acts where some of the guys pulled the chair for their ladies. In most of the cases, the guys asked the ladies what they would like to take. Based on their manner of communication, it was clear that the couples were individuals who were familiar with each other. They seemed to be more relaxed in one another’s company. As such, it was not surprising to see the guy clearing the bills for what the couple had consumed. Again, as time passed, you could observe the guys trying to engage the ladies more. The ladies on their parts were restricted to occasional giggles and mild laughter. The guys, on the other hand, were the ones doing the narration. Again there was minimal interaction between the guys from the different couples. It seemed like each guy was communicating exclusively with his lady.

As time passed with most getting intoxicated by the alcoholic drinks, each couple started moving towards the dance floor. Again, in this case, also the guy led the lady to the dance floor. Some of the couples did not go to the dance floor but instead choose either to move to the furthest sections of the club or out of the club in entirety. In most of such cases, the lady was uncontrollable and shouting incessantly. In some of the cases, it had to take the intervention of the bar guards to intervene. Where the bar guards intervened, the couple was escorted out of the club. The couples on the dance floor exhibited flirtatious behavior. The manner and way in which they danced resembled those of lovers. Occasionally they would stop, talk endlessly and then continue dancing. The guys were also not allowing any guy to come close to their ladies. There seemed to be an invisible boundary. It was maybe one of those unmentioned rules on how one has to conduct him/herself in a bar setting. The ladies’ on their part seemed to restrict their guys from observing other ladies. They wanted to be given maximum attention by their guys. The same was also seen for the couples who had moved to the furthest parts of the bar.

The Ladies and Guys Groups. As earlier mentioned, upon entering the bar most of the ladies moved towards the lounges while the guys went to the counter of the bar. Despite the fact that the different groups of ladies had entered into the club in high spirits, once inside the club, their high spirits seemed to fade away. Once seated in the lounge, each lady restricted herself to using her phone. They barely talked with each other. Each one of the ladies was on her phone perhaps chatting with her other friends. Each lady ordered and paid for her drink. None was willing to pay for all the other ladies. There were the occasional instances where a group of ladies would stare at a particular guy moving in front of them.

On their part upon entering the bar, the spirits of the guys seemed to be uplifted even more. Their emotions grew once they sat on the counter with most of them becoming lively as time passed. Unlike in the case of the ladies, among the groups of people, one of the people would buy the others guy drinks. Most of them drank a similar drink, unlike in the case of the ladies where each lady ordered a different type of alcohol. Again, unlike the ladies who were busy on their smartphones, none of the guys removed their smartphones. If they removed their smartphones from their pockets, it was perhaps to check time. They seemed to enjoy conversing with each other, talking loudly and daring each other to move toward the dance floor. They also cast glances on the ladies in the club shortly. Others even dared each other to approach the lady.

After some time, the guys started moving towards where the ladies were sat. It seemed choreographed in that each guy moved to each girl; forming pairs in the end. Each guy would then order a drink for their lady. I observed this to spur more interaction between the two. The pairs now formed would then scatter to different places in the club. I observed them move to the furthest corners of the bar. While they had come in a group of separates ladies and guys, the groups seemed to be broken. In most of these cases, the person led the lady to where they would sit. The pairs formed were also observed to spend a considerable amount of time together talking. In my interpretation, it was at this phase where they were trying to get to know each other. Their interactions culminated in the pairs moving to the dance floor where they danced together holding each other.

Conclusion

The term human sexual behavior refers to how human beings express themselves as sexual beings (Oakley,2015). That is how human beings express themselves as either males or females. The term sexual behavior is vague and subject to various gender stereotypes. In the case of the couples, it was observed that it was the guy who led the lady into the bar. In some instances, it was even observed that the guys pulled the chairs for the ladies. Subject to different cultures this may be interpreted as sexual behavior. In the definition of sexual behavior, it is seen that the behavior can be either overt or covert. Overt is the sexual behaviors that are expressible while the coverts are the ones that are not expressible (Stevenson,2016). In the case of the guy pulling the chair for the lady, it is both an overt and covert sexual behavior. It is overt in that it shows an element of care and affection from the guy to the lady. It is covert in that we cannot know with absolute certainty the intention of the act as it relates to the psychological state of the guy, which is immeasurable. This brings about the concept of ambivalent sexism. Ambivalent sexism is defined as the concept of gender attitudes that includes both the positive and negative reactions (Grubbs, Exeline & Twenge, 2014). It entails benevolent sexism and hostile sexism. Benevolent sexism views women as in need of being supported, taken care and loved by men. On the other hand, Hostile sexism views women as being inferior to men. Thus in our case, the act of the guys pulling out the chairs for the ladies can be seen as benevolent sexism. The guys do this with the aim of taking care and showing affection to the lady. It is also in this regard that the guys order the drinks for the ladies. However, the motive behind the buying of drinks is beyond our scope. The behavior can be explained by the social learning. The theory states that our sexual behaviors are usually developed and influenced by our observations in the surroundings (Rosenthal & Zimmerman,2014). Thus, the guys might have observed in their surroundings that is how ladies should be taken care.

Studies have shown that boys tend to be more girls. In most of the families in the United States of America, girls have been shown to exhibit the emotional appeal. That is girls tend to be more emotional than boys are. Therefore, it is little wonder that while in the club the boys were more active talking with each other. On the other hand, most of the ladies were seen to concentrate on their smartphones. It is for this reasons that ladies are more likely to be affected by depression compared to the ladies. It was also observed that most of the guys were indignant at other guys approaching their ladies. Studies have shown men to be more easily provoked by physical or unphysical behavior compared to the ladies. With them, they have the inherent desire to be seen as the best. On the other hand, the ladies, in the event of the guy being provoked, were resigned. Most of the ladies abhor engaging other people in social settings. This portrays feminism on their part.

In my opinion, whether to view a specific behavior as sexual behavior or not depends on one’s upbringing. As earlier mentioned there are no written rules on what constitutes sexual behavior due to the complexities associated with the subject matter. The conclusion one arrives at is dependent on one’s inferences. The act of the guys pulling the chairs for the ladies, getting provoked easily among others while they may be viewed as sexual behaviors in one culture, in another culture they may be treated as ordinary behavior.

References

Grubbs, J. B., Exline, J. J., & Twenge, J. M. (2014). Psychological entitlement and ambivalent sexism: Understanding the role of entitlement in predicting two forms of sexism. Sex Roles, 70(5-6), 209-220.

Oakley, A. (2015). Sex, gender, and society. Ashgate Publishing, Ltd.

Rosenthal, T. L., & Zimmerman, B. J. (2014). Social learning and cognition. Academic Press

Stevenson, L. (2016). Intentions, Actions, and the Human Mind. Poznan Studies in the Philosophy of the Sciences & the Humanities, 107.